“I Had Finally Come Home”: How a Restless Teen Began to Overcome Overthinking

In brief

A young North American writer spent childhood asking what life was for — until the question became a constant worry, then bitterness, drinking and a mind too crowded for school. At 15, one night with a book was where they began to overcome overthinking — and where a family began to come back together.

Too crowded to sit still

Some questions don’t let go. You lie awake asking what any of this is for, and the asking itself becomes the weight. If you’ve carried a question like that, you’ll recognize this young person.

By 14, the writer could not get through a school day.

“My mind had become so complex and full of chaotic notions that I couldn’t sit through a whole day of school or stay awake through class,” they remember. “Even the simplest tasks had become nearly impossible.”

It had started with a good question. As a young child, the writer would often think about the meaning of life, sure there was something more to it than what was being presented.

But growing older, they became “increasingly pessimistic and fearful” that they would never discover the true purpose of their life. “This prospect haunted me day in and day out,” they write, “eventually causing me so much anxiety that it even became difficult to breathe.”

By 11 they had grown very bitter towards the world and what looked like the meaninglessness of life. Their health began to slip. In the years that followed came heavy drinking and drugs, and shortly after turning 14, they were put out of the family home.

If your own mind has ever felt too crowded to live in, that is not a small thing — and you are not the only one.

The first lecture

So the writer knew something had to change. They turned toward spiritual things and understood, in a foggy way, what they needed: to find “internal freedom,” to let go of their notions, and to live in harmony with the world. “The problem was, I had no idea how to work towards this goal.”

New-age theories and religious philosophies came and went. None of them struck the writer as very profound or genuine.

Life slowly came back into some kind of order. But the old fear stayed: “a near constant worry that I would never discover the meaning of this life.” They barely spoke with their father for years.

Then, at 15, a friend introduced them to Falun Gong.

They still remember the first night vividly. They were in a very bitter mood, angry and jealous. With nothing else to do, they picked up Zhuan Falun, the main book of the practice, and read the first lecture.

“Even though much of the vocabulary was over my head, there was something familiar and comforting about the book.”

By the time they finished, they felt something new: “a sense of true calm, of contentment from the bottom of my heart.” The jealousy and bitterness that had seemed to swallow them only hours earlier were gone.

“That night, I went to sleep smiling, and got the best sleep of my life.”

Talking with a father again

Part of the writer understood, that night, that they no longer needed to fear never finding the meaning of life. “I felt like my long wait was finally over. I had finally come home.”

So they began to practice Falun Dafa seriously, learning the exercises and reading the book. The health problems that had followed them from the drinking years, they write, eased in a short time.

Old friends kept saying they looked younger and brighter. “How much younger could I get?” they joke.

The next year, the student who once couldn’t stay awake through class graduated from high school a year early, at the top of the class.

But the change they write about with the most feeling is at home.

The father they had barely spoken to for years was a serious man with no spiritual or religious beliefs. The first time they told him about Falun Gong, something turned. Having seen how much his child’s character had changed, he became very supportive — he even helped pay for trips to Falun Dafa conferences. Their mother took to the practice too.

If you’re still waiting for your own question to be answered, maybe the waiting isn’t wasted. Sometimes it is what helps you recognize the answer when it comes.

In a little over two years, the writer says, they went from “nearly dropping out of school, being distant and cold towards my family, drinking almost every day” and “being self-centered and jealous” to someone renewed “from the deepest source.”

The child who lay awake asking what life was for found an answer they could live by. And the teenager who went to bed bitter, one night at 15, went to sleep smiling.

What this story may hold for you

• Overthinking doesn’t always start with small worries. Sometimes it starts with the biggest question there is — and a mind that cares too much to leave it alone.
• The writer’s calm didn’t come from forcing the thoughts to stop. It came, they say, from finding something “familiar and comforting” that answered the question underneath.
• Bitterness and jealousy can feel like who you are. In this story they lifted in one evening; for many people it is slower. Either way, they are not the whole of a person.
• Perhaps the longest wait leads home. You might allow yourself to keep looking.
• A miracle might be the body healing, or the heart letting go, or finding meaning again — or any mix of these.

A free guide for the nights your mind won’t rest

If this story touched something in you, there are two more like it.

Our free guide, When Your Mind Won’t Rest, gathers three true stories of people who were caught in thoughts that wouldn’t switch off — and what slowly changed for them — with a gentle page on how to begin.

It’s free. One email with the guide, then a few short letters. Unsubscribe any time.

Questions readers ask

Q: How do I overcome overthinking when my mind won’t stop?

For this writer, the thoughts circled one question — what life was for — until it was hard to breathe or sit through class. What changed things was not fighting the thoughts but finding an answer that felt true, and then a daily practice to live by it. If your mind is this loud, a counselor can help too.

Q: What can I do when life feels meaningless?

The writer grew bitter at 11 because life seemed to mean nothing. They kept searching through many philosophies before one book, read on a bitter night at 15, gave them “a sense of true calm.” Their story suggests the search itself is worth honoring.

Q: Where does this story come from?

From “Falun Dafa Turned My Life Around,” chapter 45 of the eBook Hearts and Minds Uplifted, first published on Clearwisdom.net (now en.minghui.org). The author, a Western practitioner in North America, is not named in the book. The quotes are the author’s own words.

A note on health

These stories share personal experiences and inner journeys. They cannot replace professional psychological or medical help, and please don’t stop or change any treatment because of a story. If you are in serious distress or crisis, please reach out to a qualified local counselor, doctor or crisis line.